


honeyed affection;

by blue_artemis



Category: My Candy Love
Genre: F/M, Heartbreak, also armin suffers from unrequited love, also my candy is called neyler, and it's too late now anyway, and my headcanons about university life and love life, armin/oc - Freeform, back when candies names were your user name and you couldn't change it for the story, but i'm probably wrong, castiel/oc - Freeform, do i know how to pronounce it? no, i mean i guess it's angst?, i pronounce it 'ny-lah', i was twelve when i named her, if i were to consider them canon, my personal canon where everything after high school life doesn't exist, sexual intercourse while intoxicated, there are two storylines in my head when it comes to my candy love, which I don't
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-25
Updated: 2020-07-25
Packaged: 2021-03-06 02:21:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,781
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25515691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blue_artemis/pseuds/blue_artemis
Summary: armin loves neyler. neyler loves castiel. castiel loves neyler. neyler sees armin as only her friend and armin pretends that she doesn't.during university, neyler and castiel's relationship collapses.armin tries to mend neyler's heart by giving her his.
Relationships: Armin/Candy (My Candy Love), Candy/Castiel (My Candy Love)
Kudos: 2





	honeyed affection;

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this a while ago, so I figured i'd post it somwhere
> 
> i have more parts in my head but idk if i'll continue it

He meets her off the train, like always.

The first thing he notices is her red tinted eyes, blinking, forcing tears back into her eye sockets. Nothing unusual about this, whenever Neyler comes back from seeing Castiel, she’s crying, though she pretends she can hide it. The long distance really took a toll on their relationship and she hates leaving him. Armin wishes he would man up and end things already, save her the heartache. He knows this won’t happen, they’ve been together since high school and Neyler believes Castiel is the love of her life. That won’t change, he tells himself, no matter how much you want it to be you that she loves, not him.

He gives her a hug, like always. She smells of lavender and leather, Armin isn’t sure if it's from Castiel’s jacket or the train seats. Neyler hugs him a little tighter than usual, he can’t breathe for a few seconds.

“Are you okay?” He asks.

“I’m fine,” she croaks.

His first red flag. As sad as she normally is, she’ll gush about her trip with Castiel, give Armin updates on his twin brother and tell anecdotes about her insane aunt. Something must have happened, he concludes. What did that dickhead do?

Armin thinks it’s best to change the subject. He’ll ease her into telling him what’s wrong later, when she’s more settled. “So, I got that internship.”

“The…” She scrunches her nose trying to remember. “The internet one?”

He chuckles lightly. “Close enough. Yeah, that one.”

Neyler smiles but her eyes are distant, still distracted by whatever Castiel did to make her so sad. She murmurs, “I’m happy for you.”

When they get back to his apartment, Armin orders Chinese food. His plan is to give her some sense of security with food and a Harry Potter movie marathon. After a half-hearted agreement, she goes into his bathroom to freshen up after a long journey.

While Armin is setting up the T.V, Neyler’s phone buzzes. 

“Neyler!” He yells.

“Yeah?” She calls back softly.

“Your phone!”

Neyler comes back into the living room, her feet dragging on the soft carpet. She picks up the phone and hesitates, staring at the screen.

“What’s wrong?”

“I - Nothing. It’s just a voicemail.” She says confidently, but her face doesn’t match like she’s trying to convince herself. Falsely determined, she taps her phone and listens.

Armin watches, concerned. Neyler’s face starts to crumble, lips pressed together, eyes squeezed shut failing to stop the tears falling down her cheeks. When she’s done listening, she delicately places her phone on Armin’s coffee table and goes back into his bathroom without explanation.

Not that he needs one, it’s Castiel. He’s sure of it.

He knows it’s wrong. If Alexy were here he’d tell him how intrusive he’s being, how he should let Neyler tell him when she’s ready, then hit his head for good measure. But Alexy isn’t here, he’s at University, in the town they all went to high school in. The same town Neyler just came back from, where her shitty boyfriend made her cry.

He picks up her phone.

He listens to the message.

“Neyler…” Castiel’s voice crinkles. He sounds drunk, Armin thinks. Dick. “Listen… I… know it’s been hard. The distance… I hate being away from you too. And the longer we’re away from each other, the worse the pain gets. But… You can’t solve that by ending things… Neyler… Please…” To Armin’s surprise, Castiel starts crying. “I love you. Don’t leave.”

“Armin, what are you doing?”

“I...” Armin drops her phone. Neyler doesn’t look mad. Just lost. He goes over to her and wraps her into a hug.

“You broke up with him,” Armin states.

Neyler responds by burying her head into his chest and making a low wailing noise. He rubs her back, hushing comfortingly while she chokes on her tears. Suddenly, he’s transported back to three years ago, when they were still in high school. Castiel wasn’t her boyfriend then, but he still managed to hurt her when his ex, Deborah, convinced him that Neyler was sabotaging her and lying about the fact that she was a vindictive snake. Neyler argued about it with Castiel and he stormed off. That’s when Armin found her, and he comforted her like he is now. Like he always will. 

The doorbell rings. Armin had almost forgotten about their food.

“Go sit on the couch. I’ll be right back.” 

The food, no matter how delicious it is, has no effect on Neyler’s mood.

“Maybe you should get back together,” Armin says finally. He hates that he has to say it, but he’d rather see Neyler happy than the broken mess she is now.

“No. His band, it’s getting more popular, and I can’t stand in the way of that. It’s his dream, Armin. Besides, I like it here. I feel like there’s room for me here. But that means staying long distance. And the distance was killing me, killing us. It’s better to end it now before we have a messy break up where we’re both hurt.”

“Is that not what this is?” She hits his arm. “I’m just saying. Castiel seemed upset, hell, I’ve never seen him cry before and, well, just look at you. Maybe you guys can make it.”

“No, Armin. Trust me. It’s for the best.”

↣

As it turns out, “for the best” has a time limit.

It’s six months later. Armin goes over to Neyler’s apartment to celebrate the completion of her first year of University. He brought a cake in her favourite colour (blue), decorated with her favourite flowers (orchids, edible of course).

He doesn’t quite believe what he sees when he lets himself in.

Neyler was lying on her floor, her dark her splayed all around her, cradling an empty bottle of vodka in her arms. She sees Armin and jumps up, throwing the bottle onto the couch and wobbles towards him.

“Armin! Heyyy! You brought me a cake? How sweet!” She snorts. “Get it? Sweet? Cake?”

“Are you drunk?” He places the cake on the kitchen counter. Her apartment had an open floor plan, something she complained about constantly. She liked things to have their own spaces with no blurred lines, which is why she didn’t drink. Or, at least, why she usually didn’t drink.

“Drunk? Nooo.” She bops his nose. “Silly boy.”

Frowning, Armin inspects where she was lying. A spiral notebook filled with song lyrics. Unsurprising, she’s a song writing major. Then he sees it, her phone. He unlocks it and it opens on the last app she was on.

YouTube.

Castiel’s band released a music video.

Before he can comment, she plucks the phone out of his hands. “Nope! No sad songs, mister. We’re celebrating! Remember?”

“Neyler, you need to lie down.” 

“Armin. I’m fine.” She looks him in the eye, deadly serious. He’s not sure what to believe, but he trusts his gut.

“At least drink some water before we start celebrating.” He goes over to the sink, fills a glass and hands it to her.

She sighs. “If it will make you happy.”

Armin doesn’t know how she did it. A blink goes by: they’re too drunk, Neyler is leaning against his shoulder and both are hysterically laughing about old times. 

“I still can’t believe that you caused an explosion in science class!”

“Okay, listen. It wasn’t me, Amber switched the chemicals!” He protested.

“Please. I wouldn’t put it past you to have caused the explosion just to get out of working with Amber.”

“I mean… You’re not wrong.”

She looks up at him.

“You know, you’ve always been my favourite twin.”

“Yeah? Not Alexy?”

“Yeah. Not Alexy. You.”

She’s too close. His eyes drift towards her lips. It’s lucky he’s drunk, he’d never attempt this otherwise. Armin closes the gap between them and clumsily kisses her. And… Neyler kisses back?

Before he can stop himself Neyler is leading him to her bedroom. It’s dark, it’s messy, what was that he tripped over, a boot? They should stop. He knows they should. They’re too drunk for this. He’s dreamed of this for so long but never like this. He at least hoped they’d be sober.

But he can’t force himself away from her. He’s dreamed of this for so long. He loves her.

If Alexy were here, he’d murder him.

After, they lie in Neyler’s bed. The sun peeks through her bluebell blinds, shining a light on their predicament. How long did they stay up? How long were they asleep? Maybe if Armin hadn’t been so drunk he’d remember.

He looks over to Neyler, sleeping peacefully next to him. Ah, now that he remembers.

She rolls over, attaches herself to him, resting her head on his stomach. Armin had hoped for something like this, all the years he loved her, but he never thought it could happen. He gazes at her in wonder. She’s beautiful, amazing, wonderful -

“Castiel,” she breathes.

Armin freezes. 

That could mean anything. Dreams are weird. It doesn’t necessarily mean she’s still in love with him, right? Right?

He gently detaches her from himself. Breakfast. He’ll go make her breakfast.

He’s waiting for the toast to pop up when he hears a yawn. Armin turns around, perhaps too eagerly, meeting with a shocked Neyler.

“Armin? You’re still here?”

“Uh, yeah. I - I'm making breakfast.”

“Oh.” She yawns again. “That’s nice of you.”

“So… Do you remember anything from last night?”

“Uh… There was cake… We got very drunk and then…” The toast pops up, interrupting her. “Oh no.”

“Oh yes.” Armin moves towards her but she steps back.

“Armin.” She pauses, thinking over her words. “Last night was a mistake. It shouldn’t have happened.”

“What?”

“I… I’m sorry.”

Armin rubs his neck, processing. “Can I ask a question?”

“Uh, yes?”

“When you say it shouldn’t have happened, do you really mean that you can never see me as more than a friend?” 

“Armin - ”

“I love you, Neyler.” He interrupts. “I have since I first met you.”

Neyler closes her eyes for a moment, then reopens them. “I love you too, Armin. As my friend. Only as my friend.” 

“Because you’re still in love with Castiel?” She winces when she hears his name.

“That has nothing to do with - ”

“The hell it does! You said his name, Neyler!” He looks hopelessly at her. “You said his name.”

“Armin, I’m so - ”

“Sorry. Yeah, I know.”

Neyler bites her lip. “I don’t know what else to say.”

“I do.” Armin looks at her. She’s looking at him too, silently pleading with him to stay. But he knows in his heart that he’s done. 

“Goodbye, Neyler.”


End file.
